There is a new type of parent emerging, called the hyper-parent. These parents are generally well intended however they micro-manage every detail of their children’s lives. They live in constant fear that their child will under perform in some area of their lives –whether that be: academic, social, or athletic.

Many times these hyper-parents start planning their child’s life before their baby is born. The goal of these parents is to give their child any advantage that they can. They may start to research programs, classes and health related topics, which are beneficial in moderation. However when taken to extremes, this type of parenting can ultimately hinder their children independence and problem solving abilities.

A hyper-parent might seek out a prenatal educational system that claims to give creative and emotional advantages to fetuses.

Once the baby is born, the resources, classes, videos, and other product lists to keep children ahead is endless. Much of the training starts before the child can even walk. Many parents worry about their children graduating from kindergarten at the top of their class. These parents are willing to overextend their budget to provide their children with the ‘best’, play school, university, ballet teacher, and so on.

Many parents take it upon themselves to fill out university and job applications for their children. Some parent’s even become involved in their children’s workplace, negotiating a salary or attending job interviews.

Parents often feel pressure to give so much to their children that they forget to take care of their own needs. Giving too much can burn a parent out and make them less effective.

Parenting should not consume every last bit of our time, money and energy. It’s not good for us as parents, and it’s potentially dangerous for our children and their healthy development.

California-based clinical psychologist Madeline Levine wrote the bestselling book The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Maternal Advantage are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Unhappy Kids.

In it she states: "Does it matter what kind of preschool your kid goes to? No. Is your child better off at a play-based preschool than an academic preschool? Yes. But this whole bigger notion that one's whole future depends on these absolutely banal and ordinary choices that parents have to make all the time . . . just (isn't) true," says Levine, who calls hyper parenting "misplaced energy" that creates anxiety in children and can lead to depression and stress-related disorders later in life.

"Unless we start paying a lot of attention to this, we're just going to see a continued escalation of mental health problems (in youth)."

Hyper-parents have the best of intentions. They believe that the world is more dangerous and competitive than the carefree times of their own youth. Obsessing about their children’s safety and success has become the norm, and the pressure to hyper-parent is almost impossible to resist.

But there are indications that all of the attention parents bestow on their children may not have the outcome they had hoped for. In fact, it appears to be having the opposite effect. As the first batch of hyper-parented kids (Generation Y) emerges into adulthood, they do not seem to be quite ready for the real world. University psychologists report today's students experience higher levels of anxiety than any generation before them. And employers are pulling their hair out as Gen Y employees show up at work with an unprecedented sense of entitlement - 'Paying your dues' is not part of their vernacular. They require a lot of supervision and they challenge everything from dress code to office hierarchy.

How hyper-parents can empower their children:

1. Parents can give their children more responsibility and decision-making power so that they may develop an internal locus of control (high self-worth). This is important in all stages of development

2. Parents can teach their children to ask for what they need and support them in being accountable for their decisions.

3. Parents can set clear boundaries and provide their children with advice and guidance. It is beneficial for your child to make decisions and learn from their mistakes

4. Be proud of your child for his or her achievements and celebrate each accomplishment together.

Authors: Nicole Buday and Lone Jensen, Life Coaches
www.artacoach.com